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Review: Funkit Toys Random Encounters Sex Dice

Well, this is something completely new and different for me! I’ve never reviewed sex dice before! I’ve never even used sex dice before! So this is a post of all kinds of firsts! Before this, my experience with sex dice consisted of seeing them used as the butt of various sitcom TV and rom-com movie jokes. “Lick your partners elbow” and “Blow on their finger” sorts of things. I’ve watched sex dice ruin many a romantic situation, so I never really thought sex dice looked all that appealing.

But, I’m adventurous. I’ll try most things at least once. So, I was totes excited when I was given the opportunity to review the Funkit Toys Random Encounters Sex Dice.

However, I was fully not prepared for how in-depth and detailed these dice are. Holy cow. This is a full dice set, not just a couple of 6-sided dice with “ass, dick, tits, and mouth” scrawled on them… this is a full set of seven tabletop-game-style polyhedral dice. Like, if you went to your weekly D&D game and you forgot your dice… but just happened to have these in your pocket… you could totally use them in a pinch. Need to roll that perception check? No problem, grab that D20 and roll… you rolled an arm! Is that good? I don’t know…

Maybe these won’t exactly work for that… but we could play a rousing game of sexy D&D with these. You approach the mysterious figure in the distance, they are beckoning to you, but you are unsure of what they want… Roll for seduction… With your lips parted you approach the figure, dropping to your knees you begin to slowly lick up their leg…

Become a wizard at sexy times.

When we first pulled the dice out of their packaging (which is a super nice, sturdy box by the way) I was overwhelmed. There were so many dice with all kids of options. So many options. Our first mess around with the dice we didn’t really read through the information provided and just started rolling dice and using them all which lead us to a combination of Intense Ear Fingering in the Shower which felt… like maybe we weren’t doing something quite right. But also, I was ready to follow through with this… my girlfriend… was skeptical… but willing.

When we finally read through the included written materials we learned that there is actually more rhyme and reason behind the dice and how to use them (although, you’re your own person, use them how you want, finger your girlfriend’s ear). The Quick Start Sheet outlines three “games” that can be played. The Classic, Twisted, and Get a Clue. Each of these games uses a different combination of dice to give you varying outcomes (I resisted so hard writing “outcums”). We played all three versions and enjoyed ourselves each time! Although, the number of times we rolled butthole during Twisted was astonishing. I rolled nibble butthole… talk to the butthole… suck the butthole… it was just… oops all butthole. We also had a game where everything was very feet-centric. I went my whole life without licking a foot… but now… I’ve licked, bit, and sucked my partner’s foot.

If you want an idea of just how thorough these dice are, have a gander at this… Funkit Toys thought of everything…

D4 – This is the most basic of the dice and contains the mouth, hands, bits, and butt.

D6 – This die holds all of the mouth verbs. Give this one a roll if you need to figure out what to do with your mouth.

D8 – Need something for your hands to do? Roll this.

D10A – This die is all about location.

D10B – Roll this to get a suggestion of the intensity in which you are doing all this mouthing and grabbing. You can roll from 1-10, how you interpret that is up to you.

D12 – Mood. Ready to switch up the tone of your play? Roll this and get silly, rough, serious and more!

D20 – This one is all about the body parts. Use this one with the D4 (Mouth) or the D8 (Hands) and give your partner’s body a little extra attention.

Make your backstory your own.

If you get your dice set and see something that is just a hard no for you, don’t worry, Funkit Toys has thought of this and has included some blank stickers to replace any unwanted options. Leave the sticker blank and call it a “wild card” or “dealer’s choice” or bust out your art skills and add your own doodle. Also, if you are a more adventurous sort you can add the “outdoors” sticker onto your location die. I was actually surprised by how customizable this dice set can be! Easy to make it your own!

Something I really super appreciated about these dice is that all the activities and descriptors are gender neutral. Not a single mention of any specific genitals in sight. The instructions refer to them as “bits” and the icon on the dice is a pair of underwear. I can’t imagine a bigger mood killer than the dysphoria that would accompany a roll of the wrong genitalia. As a trans couple, we give this a thumbs up.

My one and only issue with this whole set is the Guide to Dildivination (or how to roll up a horny bard) instruction booklet. There are so many words. And these words are in a font and spacing that I just have the hardest time processing for whatever reason. I look at the booklet and just kind of panic. My girlfriend though didn’t seem to have an issue interpreting things, so I am just going to chalk it up to my ADHD brain just being unable to cope with it as written. But that’s it, that is literally my only gripe with the Random Encounters Sex Dice and this is really just a fun bonus that has no bearing on using the Sex Dice themselves. The Guide to Dildinivation is a little booklet with descriptions to help guide you on divining a future lover or creating your own horny TTRPG character. A cute little extra you get with the Random Encounters Sex Dice Deluxe Set.

I honestly wasn’t expecting to enjoy these as much as I did. They are just dice after all… how much fun could they really be. The answer is… really fun… I enjoyed the gamified creative guidance that these dice gave and that you could follow the dice as much or as little as you wanted… because it’s your sex adventure, you make the rules, but the dice are there as a helpful… DM… offering up some scenarios to move the story along. We had silly fun, we had sexy fun, we had silly sexy fun. Silly in that sometimes we took the rolls a little too literally and I was biting my girlfriend’s foot like a rabid raccoon. We rolled some options – like sucking a butthole… which we opted to not follow through on… but we did have lots of laughs about it. Which is a whole bonding experience in itself.

TLDR; Accept the quest.

Sex dice get a bad rap but the Funkit Toys Random Encounter Sex Dice are here to change that. You don’t have to worry about undesirable combinations such as licking elbows with this set of seven table top game style dice. Enjoy some gamified guidance and add your own sexy spin on the actions! A quality set of dice with plenty of instructions on how to use them! If you aren’t quite ready to bring home a full-fledged sex toy these sex dice are definitely a totally non-intimidating option to bring home and try out with your partner. Highly recommend!

You can pick up the Funkit Toys Random Encounters Sex Dice directly from the Funkit Toys.

The Funkit Toys Random Encounters Sex Dice was paid for by Funkit Toys in exchange for my honest review. 

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